I realise this may not be that great of a story, it's my first one that I've ever written. I have read many great stories on this site and decided to give it a shot. Constructive Critisism would be nice.
I wake up, get out of bed, walk to the bathroom to relieve myself, then examine myself. Nothing has changed, still 16 year old, six foot, long, almost too long brown curly-ish hair, blue eyes, slightly overweight John. After finishing my daily morning routine of taking a leak and brushing my teeth I head down the hallway from my room to go check the time. I find my mother sitting at the kitchen table and I glance over at the clock to see that it is two in the afternoon, Nothing unusual with that. It's the middle of the summer and I tend to stay up late at night and sleep the day away. I grab a bowl, cereal, and milk then sit down next to my mother and start up a conversation with her. It's Saturday morning and she reminds me that her and her boyfriend are heading up north to the mountain for the weekend and that I will have the house to my self seeming that my sister will not be home either. I hadn't really made any plans so it looked like it was just going to be another weekend of screwing around playing Xbox and listening to music.
After the short conversation with my mom I go back and figure I have nothing else better to do so I flick on my TV and Xbox. In the middle of a match of Call Of Duty I look down to see that I had a text message on my cell.
“Hey, was just wondering if you were busy this weekend?”
It was from my good friend Christina, her and I had become really close over the past year after my sister and her stopped hanging out too much. She was one of the only girls that I didn't mind having over my house because she wasn't one of the annoying ones. For only 14 she was also turning into a pretty attractive girl. She was a skinny little thing with a cute face, beautiful brown hair, and a pair of gorgeous eyes. Along with that she had a smaller sized chest which didn't bother me at all because I thought it looked perfect on her, and with that she had a pretty nice ass on her as well.
I decided that I probably should do something else for a change and hang out with someone so I replied back to her saying that I wasn't and asked her if she wanted to come spend the night at my place. (My mom doesn't have a problem with me having girls over because she has gained a lot of trust in me) She stated that she wanted to so I told her that I would pick her up in an hour or so. I showered, shaved, and tried to make myself look as good as possible. I had always had a soft spot for Christina but being the shy person I am, never had the balls to tell her how I felt and at this point I felt it wasn't even worth it anymore because we were probably in the whole “friend zone” now.
I went and grabbed my keys, told my mom what was going on, then headed outside to my car. Got it started and headed off on the short trip to her house. On the way back I asked her what she wanted to do tonight. She gave me her usual answer of “something fun.” I figured we'd just end up playing some games together then watching a few movies while sitting on the couch together. (which was always my favorite part.) I pulled into my driveway and noticed my mom's car was gone so I guess that she already left. I also noticed that she took the dogs too which really made me happy because as soon as anybody walked into my house my dogs go crazy and bark like idiots for like an hour and it can get quite irritating.
As I walked to the house I noticed the slightly revealing clothing Christina was wearing. She was wearing a tight fitting t-shirt with those short shorts that all the girls like to wear during the summer. I honestly thought she looked pretty damn sexy but I wasn't just going to tell her that. I think she had noticed me checking her out though as she turned around waiting for me at the door to my house but she just looked at me with a little grin on her face. My face though, turned a very deep shade of red.
We walked into the house and I grabbed us both something to drink then we went and sat down in my bedroom. She just threw herself down on my bed and spread herself out. I sat down in my chair next to my bed and handed her her drink. We ended up playing video games for an hour or so then Christina decided that she wanted to go watch movies. We headed to the living room and sat down on the couch. She picked out some movie that I wasn't too interested in so I just sat there and blankly looked at the screen. About halfway through the movie I could feel her moving closer to me and she rested her head on my shoulder. I could smell her hair and it smelled amazing. I placed my arm around her shoulder and placed my hand on her head so I could slowly stroke her hair. We stayed like this for the rest of the movie and once it ended she shifted herself so that she was laying across my lap. She picked another movie, same scenario as the last one for me so I just pretended to watch the movie and just looked at her out of the corner of my eye. I just couldn't get over how amazing she looked.
I felt her move slightly and looked down to see her looking up at me, our eyes met and we held that position for what felt like hours which was probably a mere 10-15 seconds just gazing into each others eyes. She smiled at me and I smiled back and all the while I was feeling bold and decided to take a chance. I leaned down and gave her a quick gentle kiss on the lips, as soon as my lips made contact with hers I immediately regretted my decision. As I pulled away I was expecting to see shock on her face and then was waiting for her to slap me across the face. Instead, I noticed that she was smiling even more and she was giggling slightly. Before I knew it she was leaning up towards me and pulling me in for another kiss, this time it lasted a lot longer than the last and I was surprised at how much passion was put into her kiss. I was almost frozen for a few seconds before I started to actually kiss her back. It felt like time stood still. I was actually sitting here kissing the girl I had loved for almost a year now, it felt surreal.
We pulled away from each other and all she said was “God, I've been waiting for that forever now.” as she had a huge smile on her face. All I could manage to say without stumbling too bad was “I love you.” Before we started to kiss again, this time it was a lot more heated. I slipped my tongue into her mouth and our tongues started to dance around each other as we explored each others mouth. She sat up and got onto my lap as she wrapped her arms around my neck and I wrapped mine around her waist pulling her tightly against me. I started to rub her lower back slowly and run my hand up the back of her shirt. All the while she was moving her hands all over my chest and stomach while we were sharing our passion for each other with our tongues. I placed gentle kisses from her lips over to her ear where I lightly started to nibble on her earlobe. This got a nice reaction out of her as I could hear her quietly let out a few moans next to my ear.
Hearing that only encouraged me more as I made my way down to her neck and I kissed all around underneath her chin occasionally nipping at her neck. As I was doing that I could feel her moving almost grinding her hips back and forth on my lap. I had barely been able to hold back my hard on all night but that just set me off and in a matter of seconds my dick was as hard as a rock. I pulled away for a second to pull her shirt off and reveal her sexy stomach and beautiful chest to me. Then, I pulled my own shirt off and proceeded to unhook her bra. After that I went back to nipping at her neck and gradually making my way down her chest her tits. Once I made it there I ran my tongue between them before making my way up to one of her little rock hard nipples and flicking my tongue in circles around it. All the while her grinding had gotten more aggressive and I could feel her arching her back towards me.
As I took the nipple into my mouth while I slide a hand down her stomach to start rubbing around it slowly. While I gently started to suck on her nipple I could hear her quietly moan. Her hands were making their way down my stomach and I could feel her gently running her fingers under the waist band of my pants. I very lightly bit down on her nipple and grazed my teeth back and forth over it and she really seemed to enjoy that. While I was enjoying her tits I felt her hand slide into my pants and she started to gently stroke her hand up and down my dick. Her hands soft hand felt fantastic on my dick and the sudden touch sent shivers up my spine. Figuring that I should return the favor my hand slowly made it's decent towards her pants and I slid them in. My hand hadn't gone inside of her panties so I just started to slowly rub her pussy over her underwear. The amount of heat that thing was giving off was astounding. It only manage to make my dick get even harder if that was even possible.
She pulled her hand out to undo my pants and release my dick from the confinement of my pants. As soon as she did that she wrapped her soft fingers around my dick and continued to stroke it up and down. I then took my mouth off of one nipple and moved over to the other and sucked on it while flicking my tongue in circles around that one. Also, I pushed down a bit harder on her pussy as I was rubbing it. Her grip on my dick only grew tighter and her speed only increased. I then slipped my hand into her panties and only then got a feel of just how wet she was. Upon feeling that my dick twitched a bit and I ran my finger up and down her slit slowly as her moaning only got louder. By now she was really pumping my dick and I must say, It felt way better than when I did it myself. While rubbing my finger up and down her pussy I used my thumb to gently massage her tiny clit. At the first touch of it she let out a tiny squeal and then a loud moan. I guess she really enjoyed that so I continued to do it only getting a little faster and more forceful.
As she was pumping my dick I could feel something start to build inside me and I knew I wasn't going to last much longer. My mouth was still stuck on her nipples and I continue to rub her clit faster and harder, her moans only getting louder and louder. I could feel her grip tightening and her body tensing up as she started to go into an orgasm. I could feel her juices leaking onto my hand and she just kept pumping away on my dick. Feeling her juices on my hand and hearing her orgasm was all it took, I started to shoot my cum in the air little bits of it landed on the both of us. After that she just fell over on top of me.
We both fell down the length of the couch sideways the length of the couch. I had my arms wrapped around her little body tightly and I just listened to her breathing for a while as she slept. I kept replaying the whole scenario over and over and was just thinking of how great this weekend was going to be.
Great story. Please continue with a part 2 but don't make it too weird or completely unrealistic (ie 9in dicks) like many of the sequels on this site get.
I cannot think of one thing to critize as far as the story itself goes. But as someone else said, make sure the story is only in present tense. Great job!
90 th percentile of the stuff on this site, how to get it to 95th or more: watch that slipping into past tense. Past tense stories are okay, present tense is better, but if there's some of one, and some of the other, it's not as good.
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I cannot think of one thing to critize as far as the story itself goes. But as someone else said, make sure the story is only in present tense. Great job!
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